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Posts Tagged ‘parenting’

As an immigrant, we always get overjoyed traveling to India for summer vacation.Looking back at my 10 yrs in US, my visit to India was almost every year with family.
I had traveled with my husband and my kids all these years. Being married early and having my first daughter at the age of 22 had never left me alone for a second.

My visit to india in may 2010 was for 2 weeks and alone. After the tearful departure at the airport, I found myself settling in the waiting seat . I have no words to describe the emotions I had at the moment I became aware of being alone. I was surrounded by a huge crowd in the airport. I felt pin drop silence in spite of the noices.I took out my kindle(my birthday gift from my husband) and tried to focus and read . I had no constant distractions from my kids , I had no restroom visits to take care of at the last moment, I had no sibling fights to handle. I had time to read a book. I was all by myself. I couldn’t focus. My eyes were wet and my hands searched for my cell phone. I typed a miss you text to my husband’s cell number. I waited gazing at the phone. My heart beeped at the sms reply from him. I looked at the family picture in my cell . I was staring at my kids faces and for some reason I felt guilty.

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Frustrated Boy
Are we pushing our kids too hard?
Are we making them more stressful?

I always ask these questions to myself.
My childhood had less opportunities. I lacked the commitment to stick to any activity I pursued. I joined the music class and left it half way through. Same happened with my dance class.
I had a passion for writing , but never found time with my constant drive for grades.

I found myself pushing my kids in activities in the interest of my own ego. I didn’t realize until lately the adverse impact my childhood dreams were having on my family and my kids.
As parents we all have good intentions. We want our children to excel in all areas. But if you think about it , are our intentions noble ?

We enroll our kids in extra curricular activities most of the times due to social pressure, our own ego, our childhood dreams.
We do sacrifice and take them to every class rain or shine. It is also important to remember the extra curricular activities per se are not the problem.
Research have shown that kids performing various activities like sports, music have higher levels of self-confidence and academic performance.

But have we gone to an extreme?

  • What if these activities are making the kids overwhelmed?
    What if our expectations are crunching the family time?
    What if your child is into these activities with no interest?
  • If your child is over stressed and you find yourself having no family time, it’s time to cut back on their activities.

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